🙋♀️ Raise your hand if your answer was yes! Definitely raising my hand here, more than once. What if I told you the falling off the wagon is part of the journey, part of your healing journey?
That would all of a sudden feel better, you would not be so hard on yourself.
I am here to tell you that your healing journey is not linear, it is not a straight line it is more like the labyrinth path. It includes many revolutions, that can feel like the same circle, but in fact you are moving closer and closer to the core.
Something I learned from one of my mentors is we have been looking at healing through the eyes of the medical model and that is where we went wrong.
That really resonated with me, if you take a moment to think about that, the medical model sees a problem, offers a diagnosis and then usually some form of medication or therapy to “fix it”.
I am here to tell you "you are not something that needs fixing".
What if we started to look at healing as life long, my private clients know too well that this is my ‘point of view’. Just like we look at our physical health with diet and exercise, a life long lifestyle to ensure our bodies are healthy and can carry us through our full souls journey.
So if healing is lifelong, what does that look like?
🙋♀️Raise your hand if you feel like you have fallen off the diet and exercise wagon? Again definitely have my hand up here and of course that is also part of our physical health journey and I am sure where the 80/20 rule came from. Good 80% of the time and a little naughty 20% of the time. As human beings we can’t be Angels 😇 all of the time. 😏
Lifelong healing is the same and I would even go as far as to use the same 80/20 rule, having great self-care and healing strategies in place 80% of the time and taking a break 20% of the time, gives you a great balance and supports your overall health in mind, body and spirit.
I am known to say to my clients "It's okay to take a break from your healing"
It can be met with some weird stares and silent moments 😉 I think their logical mind is saying but isn’t that why we are here to heal? Of course that is my role to support you in healing but I am also very real with my clients and know sometimes they need a break for a bit and I also know that too is part of the healing journey.
I encourage you to take a break to look back, to take the time to acknowledge and gain some awareness on how far you have come. Always looking forward can cause you to always be reaching and searching for something you feel you don’t have yet.
Taking the time to look back will give you a feeling of awe, you will be amazed at how far you have come and the differences within you and how you are showing up in your world.
Whilst I encourage a break every now and then I also insist on some things that still need to be happening, such as continuing with self-care habits we have built together, and boundaries we have implemented.
This is where "falling off the wagon" is part of your healing journey.
If you stay on your healing wagon, doing all the things and never faltering, how will you know what you have been doing is even working?
Similar to the diet and exercise analogy, if you don’t loosen the reigns a little, how will you know if you are able to eat and exercise intuitively and what your body needs.
The same goes for your healing journey, loosening the reigns a little allows you to see what has changed, what needs to remain and what you may not need anymore.
I hear from my private clients "I feel like I've gone backwards".
It absolutely can feel like that, as I tell them and I want to share with you too, it is a labyrinth path not a straight line. You are going around a deeper revolution and the growth you will be able to notice once you bring some awareness to it, is the increased speed in which you notice the changes.
For example:
- Reacting in a way you don’t like, you will notice it quicker
- A physical feeling, you will pick up on it quicker
- Noticing the build (something I teach my private clients)
- Coming back into alignment quicker
These all show that you have not fallen backwards but in fact are in a deeper revolution, closer to the core of the final revolution.
I would love to hear how you are now looking at times where you have felt you have fallen off the healing wagon. Comment below and let me know, I personally reply to every comment.
Nicole Ivens is a Holistic Counsellor and Certified Clinical EFT Practitioner.
Nicole is a Highly Sensitive Soul, Empath, and quietly spoken Introvert (INFJ).
Nicole is passionate about providing a safe space for her clients to embark on their healing journey.
She is well known for empowering her clients to take up space and know it is their time to thrive.
Her motto is:
“To Heal is to Feel Safe”
