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How to Boost Your Immune System

How to Boost Your Immune System

How To Boost Your Immune System

 

This is a topic and question on everyone’s mind right now on a global scale, how can I boost my immunity?  I know for me when this global pandemic started my first thoughts went to how am I going to keep my girls safe, especially my eldest who is immunocompromised.

We went through all the normal steps that were being recommended by medical experts, social distancing, personal hygiene, hand sanitizer and vitamin supplements.

As an energy healer I was very aware that there was more too it, there were other things that had the capacity to be lowering our immunity.

According to the Centre for Disease Control (CDC) there is and emotional component in 85% of all illnesses.

Stress and anxiety can have a huge impact on your physical health, especially chronic levels and during this time there is unprecedented levels of stress in people on a global scale.

To add to that is not only your own stress and anxiety, but what you as an Empath are feeling from not only those in your physical presence but the overwhelming vibration of our planet right now.

You may look at your own circumstances and feel you know what it’s okay, I am doing fine, yet still experiencing a low grade anxiety.  The issue I have noticed with that is, when it is your own stress and anxiety you can use your coping tools but when its coming from something you know nothing about, now that is challenging.

Just the awareness of the vibration that the planet is operating at right now can be a huge help to you, knowing that you may feel a low grade anxiety that is not yours helps you to cope.

Connecting in with your cosmic team and always asking the question “is this mine?” If not ask them to release it from your auric field.  Due to the high levels of anxiety right now, it is important to add this to your tool box and use it regularly.

Lets look at how stress effects your immune system:

“Since emotions run every system in the body, don’t underestimate their power to treat and heal” – Dr Candace Pert

What we think and what we tell ourselves can either support or undermine our health.  Because the immune system is so sensitive to thoughts, emotions, and subtle energies, energy healing can be an extremely useful tool in supporting wellness, fighting illness and speeding healing.


According to Neuroscientist Dr Joe Dispenza – You can read full article here

How to Boost Your Immune System

“As people begin to overcome emotional states that keep them connected to past experiences—as they break out of redundant habits and automatic programs, as well as change certain self-destructive attitudes and beliefs—aspects of their immune system up-regulate genes. This means that their thoughts and feelings are signaling cells within the body’s internal defense system to turn on healthy genes to make better proteins—otherwise known as healthy anti-bodies—as well as a host of other beneficial chemicals to balance and regulate the body. This process in turn reduces inflammation, suppresses tumors, mobilizes enzymes, and so on.

So the next time you sit down to create a better life, a healthier body, or a new experience, just remember that your brain and body have never been separate and the bridge between them is your immune system. You see, your body has always been spying on your brain. So why not use your nervous system—the greatest pharmacist ever—to activate your body’s internal army to create order for you every day? You don’t even need a prescription.”


Understanding the effect of stress on your physical body is the first step but as we all know stress is a constant in all of our lives.  So the important thing is to learn how to navigate it in your life, finding, understanding and implementing coping tools that help to reduce your stress levels.

EFT has been shown through scientific studies to have a great effect both on lowering stress levels but also the physical effects of stress on the body, including the immune system.  The following physical improvements have been recorded:

  • Lowers your blood pressure
  • Boosts your immune system
  • Reduces inflammation
  • Lowers your level of stress hormones
  • Boosts your metabolism
  • Counters aging
  • Improves your resting heart rate
  • Helps your cells fight cancer
  • Counters insulin resistance
  • Improves your neural signaling
  • Counters autoimmune disease
  • Strengthens your cell membranes
  • Reduces oxidative stress

How to Boost Your Immune System

EFT Tapping has been scientifically proven to rewire the brain to bring both the body and mind back into balance!

“The most revealing studies of the physiological aspects of EFT have examined its epigenetic effects. A population of veterans with PTSD received 10 EFT sessions. It found regulation of 6 genes associated with inflammation and immunity. A pilot study comparing an hour-long EFT session with placebo in 4 nonclinical participants found differential expression in 72 genes. These included genes associated with the suppression of cancer tumors, protection against ultraviolet radiation, regulation of type 2 diabetes insulin resistance, immunity from opportunistic infections, antiviral activity, synaptic connectivity between neurons, synthesis of both red and white blood cells, enhancement of male fertility, building white matter in the brain, metabolic regulation, neural plasticity, reinforcement of cell membranes, and the reduction of oxidative stress. The broad function of this suite of genes is similar to that found in Church et al, confirming the association of EFT with the downregulation of inflammation and stress markers and the upregulation of immune markers.”  You can read the full scientific study here

Whilst seeing the scientific studies is needed and fantastic to see, I have found both my own personal experience and those of my clients is the most powerful. Just a short three years ago I was very unwell physically after many years of chronic stress levels due to my daughters seizures.

Through the use of EFT to navigate my stress levels, I was able to not only cope with what I needed to deal with I was able to heal events, memories and words of my past that were having a large impact on my body.

I went from getting sick all the time, a new cold or infection every week to feeling well and not catching any colds or infections.  I was amazed to see the difference in how I was feeling just by healing emotionally.

“Our emotional wellbeing has a massive effect on our physical wellbeing” – Nicole Ivens


To start to learn how to navigate your stress and anxiety levels and learn the wonderful and effective technique of EFT, you can book your session here.

Nicole Ivens | Empath Counsellor

surrender

Surrender your Stranglehold on the Universe

“All we have is this moment, yesterday is gone and tomorrow is yet to arrive”

 

Surrender

The attempt and effort to control each moment is an exercise in futility, there are way too many forces at play at any given moment to have full control over anything.  As you do make this attempt instead of gaining the outcome you are looking for, you are in actual fact, cutting off the flow from the Universe.

 

Surrendering to each and every moment, releases anxiety and worry, in this moment you can breathe.  You can handle this moment!  Surrendering is letting go of control, relinquishing the idea that all you have is your own power that there is no-one else.

You can handle this moment! 

In a place of control you are cutting off the power of the universe, a stranglehold on your life and then wondering why it’s not working out how you envisioned.  It reminds me of a saying:

“If you love something, let it go and if it returns, it is yours forever”

surrender

Whilst surrendering and letting go is frightening, the immense relief you will feel is more than worth the moment of fear.  Remember as a child you didn’t have to worry how things happened,  you could rely on a bigger power – Your Parents.

It is no different now, there is a bigger infinite power at play – The Universe.  You just need to trust in her, like you trusted in your parents to never lead you astray.

When we are continuously worrying about things, whether it’s about what has been or what has yet to come, it’s like we are really putting a stranglehold on the Universe.  Not allowing it to flow through us because we are strangling it, strangling it with worry, strangling it with anxiety and strangling it with stress.

If we can surrender to the current moment, surrender to right now that is like us just releasing that stranglehold.  It is allowing us to really trust in the Universe, trusting that she knows what we need in each and every moment, trusting that she will provide for us in each and every moment, financially, emotionally, physically and spiritually.

Providing us with everything we need in each and every moment, imagine living from that place, how different would your life look if you did that?  If you just surrendered, surrendered to each moment, not worrying about what has been, not worrying about what is yet to come, just surrender to NOW.

Having unwavering faith and unwavering trust, that everything you need is going to flow to you.  In actual fact what we have been doing by having the stranglehold is not allowing those things to flow to us, we are really putting a kink in it, making it extremely hard for information, guidance and physical items to flow through to us.

Just like when you put a kink in a hose, the water just stops flowing doesn’t it, there is no where for it to go, it certainly can’t flow through to the end of the hose.

surrender

 

All the Universe wants is to flow through you, your source is infinite, so you are infinite.  We are all connected, so if we can allow ourselves to be in the present moment to surrender to that, to lean in to that then things are going to flow with so much ease.  There won’t be that constriction, there won’t be that kink, it is just going to flow very easily.

“Have unwavering faith and unwavering trust, that everything you need is going to flow to you”

Take on the challenge of surrendering to each and every moment, letting go of the past and not worrying about the future.  How much will you surrender to the current moment?

To feel supported as you learn to live in this new way, our Mystical Membership is the perfect place for you to start to explore, Your Way and Your Path.  You can learn more here.

ask your angels ep35

Energy of the Week | Ask Your Angels Ep35

ASK YOUR ANGELS ~ EPISODE 35

Energy of the week for 30th March – 5th April 2020

Tune in to your Cosmic Team and Ask Your Angels what do I need?
Pick card 1, 2, 3 or 4.

 

ask your angels ep35

Your Guidance Revealed

ask your angels ep35

Card 1: Lost In Our Own Equations

Your guidance starts at 1:00 in the video below.

In our current times it is so easy to get stuck within your own mind and within your own thoughts, the angels are guiding they are very aware of all the anxiety that is within us and around us right now.  It is a prime time for anxiety right now and for those of you that have struggled with anxiety in the past, it may be surfacing now like never before because it is saying “see I told you so, I told you something would go wrong”.

So it is more important now to be implementing and using all the strategies I have shared with you over the episodes of Ask Your Angels, Journaling, meditation, EFT and grounding.  Right now I am showing up for each of you over on my Facebook page, Mon-Fri @8am AEST with my Calming Moment, giving you the opportunity to come out of your head and into your heart space.

Your angels like always are in a very supportive and cheerleader mode urging you to do all the things you know you need to do during this process and any challenging times you experience.  They have your back and are cheering you on from the sidelines “You Can Do It!”

Card 2: Lotus Rose

Your guidance starts at 3:10 in the video below.

A lotus rose grows and even thrives in the most difficult of circumstances, it actually grows in the mud and boy is that the energy we are currently residing in.  Like in card #1 there is so much anxiety around, everyone is experiencing at the very least a low grade anxiety and as an empath you are feeling and bathing in that energy.  The angels want to remind you just like the lotus rose, you too can grow and thrive through the mud, in actual fact the growth you experience right now will be so profound it will propel your soul forward 10 speed.

I have seen an example of this just this past week, with younger people aka millennial’s saying “we have never experienced anything like this before”.  Whilst true for them yes, its not true for us in the older generation, whilst we haven’t been through this exactly, we have all suffered challenging times.  So they have been plotting along with normal life, no mud to speak of and now they are struggling a little more than us due to their lack of experience and exposure.

They are certainly going to come out of this with a whole lot more resilience than they went into it with and the same with you, you are going to come out of this experience with amazing confidence knowing you can grow through anything, you can survive anything, because you just did.

Card 3: The Universe

Your guidance starts at 5:22 in the video below.

The universe has a message for you that she is healing and as she heals you heal too and the angels are saying this is happening for us, not to us.  I know in life it can certainly feel like things are happening to us and I understand that completely, but if you can have a shift in perspective you will start to see some of the benefits of right now.

Families are having more time to spend together (I know not always a good thing lol) but the rushing, the jam packed schedules, the filling our lives with things and experiences not for our highest good have been stripped from us.  We are all going to come out of this with a very different perspective of what we need and what we choose to fill our time with moving forward.

Have you seen the amazing footage of mother nature healing, animals coming back out and the amount of butterflies and dragonflies around.  All signs of healing, all signs of growing and all signs of transformation.

The angels are asking me to ask you “Can you see it?”

Card 4: Buddha Nature

Your guidance starts at 7:28 in the video below.

Come into the present moment, Buddha Nature is all about mindfulness and being in the current moment.  Following on from card #1 anxiety does not exist in the present moment, it is always in the future, worrying about what is going to happen, what is yet to come.

In this moment right here and right now, you are safe.  A great mantra to have with you in times of anxiety “My name is ……….. and right here and right now I am safe”.  It is only when you project into the future is your anxiety going to skyrocket, when you start to worry about tomorrow, what tomorrow will look like, how you will cope in tomorrows world, all future projected.

When you notice yourself doing this bring yourself back, a great way to do that is through grounding.  I have a great PDF I would love to send to you, if this is something you are struggling with.  Click below to download your copy.

Grounding Techniques

This week is providing you with amazing support to cope through our current global crisis, having your anxiety recognised and provided with ways to move through the high levels of stress and anxiety been felt across the world. 

If you are struggling right now and could really do with some extra support, I am here for you.  You can book your free strategy session here


You can also watch my Video to hear more about each card and the guidance I provided ~ click below

I would love to hear how the guidance resonates for you right now, comment right here on the blog.

You can also subscribe to my YouTube Channel here….so you get notified each time I share new content.


 

Nicole Ivens | Gold Coast Counsellor

Ask Your Angels EP20

Energy of the Week ~ Ask Your Angels Ep20

ASK YOUR ANGELS ~ EPISODE 20

Energy of the week for 16th-22nd December 2019

Tune in to your Cosmic Team and Ask Your Angels what do I need?
Pick card 1, 2, 3 or 4.

 

Ask Your Angels Ep20

Your Guidance Revealed

Ask Your Angels Ep20

Card 1:

Your guidance starts at 1:25 in the video below.

RELATIONSHIP HARMONY – A wonderful card to receive right before the Christmas Period, what could be better than feeling the love and peace that comes when each and every person has an open heart.  This is the gift the Angels are giving you, what they are asking from you is that you manage your expectations during this time, Christmas is usually a time where we come together with people we don’t necessarily see all that much throughout the year and this can cause friction and tension sometimes.  Coming into it with an open heart and lowering your expectations allows you to the enter the space with a lightness and with that comes a more joyful experience, as you aren’t expecting anything from anyone and with that comes harmony and beautiful surprises and miracles bestowed upon you.

In the video below I share more about this concept and process and give you some insight on what will ensure your experience is one of joy and love.

Card 2:

Your guidance starts at 4:05 in the video below

ANGEL THERAPY – Fancy that another week of our guidance following on like a beautiful story, the angels are blessing you with open hearts all around and now Archangel Raphael is coming in and showering you with his beautiful healing energy and asking you to hand anything over to him, you don’t have to do it alone.  As I mentioned in Card 1 Christmas can be a time of tension and stress and we can sometimes feel we have to do it alone, but NO your angels are there to support you and pave the way for you to have a beautiful relaxing experience if you allow them to help you.

In the video below I talk about how Christmas is known as a time of coming together, celebrating and forgiveness but it can also be a time of reflection, what has the past being about, what has it taught you?  In my view and the angels are guiding as well its not the best time to be trying to mend deep hurt with other people, because tensions can be running high, alcohol flowing and expectations are also high.

Card 3:

Your guidance starts at 6:58 in the video below

YOU ARE SAFE – What is better than that, to know you are safe.  Our beautiful strong Archangel Michael is with you, ready to cut through any negative energy that you may pick up with his infamous sword.  He is wanting you to know that he has your back!  There may be situations you find yourself in over the holidays that maybe are not of your choosing and not something you may know how to necessarily cope with, this is where he is going to come in and support you, if you allow him to.

Ask for his strength and courage to help you through times that may see you surrounded with people that are not necessarily on your vibration level, yes family are not always understanding or respectful of our difference and our growth and that can be challenging.  So ask Archangel Michael to be with you and surround you in his beautiful purple light and to cut any cords with people that you no longer want your energy attached to, now this doesn’t mean that you don’t love them or even want to sever all communication, it is just cutting the energetic cord, so your energy stays protected.

Card 4:

Your guidance starts at 11:43 in the video below

ALL IS WELL – What a beautiful way to end our story this week and also as an individual message for you, ALL IS WELL!  Isn’t that what we all want to just know that everything is going to be okay.  What the angels are guiding is if you can follow their guidance during this time, and well of course always, then all will be well.  They are also guiding there are going to be times where you need to let things play out, even if it doesn’t feel good and even downright painful sometimes, you just need to let it be.  Now I know as empaths and sensitive souls this isn’t easy for us, because we are so compassionate and always wanting to help and serve others.  But sometimes we just need to let things be and see where they go, not interfering, just going with the flow and only acting from a place of alignment and when you feel guided to step in.

Now we all know how easily we can be triggered by family, boy are they good at pressing our buttons, but it is your job to just stand back and allow it to just flow over you like water off a ducks back.  No reacting, just observing and removing yourself from the situation if need be.   As you do that you will soon see that ALL IS WELL.

 

What a beautiful story this week, an empowering one I feel, knowing that you are in control, you can lower those expectations and go into each day and each event with an energy of lightness and relaxation.  Not concerned with things going perfectly, but just spending time with people you love and knowing you have the power, strength and healing of the Archangels right by your side. 

 

You can also watch my Video to hear more about each card and the guidance I provided ~ click below

I would love to hear how the guidance resonates for you right now, comment right here on the blog.

You can also subscribe to my YouTube Channel here….so you get notified each time I share new content.


 

Nicole Ivens | Gold Coast Counsellor

 


I offer Online Intuitive Readings to provide you with more personal and detailed guidance.  You can learn more and book your Intuitive Reading Here.

Energy of the Week ~ Ask Your Angels Episode 13

ASK YOUR ANGELS ~ EPISODE 13

Energy of the week for 28th October – 3rd November 2019

Tune in to your Cosmic Team and Ask Your Angels what do I need?
Pick card 1, 2, 3 or 4.

Energy of the Week - Ask your Angels Episode 13

 

Your Guidance Revealed

Energy of the Week - Ask Your Angels Episode 13

Card 1:

Your guidance starts at 1:50 in the video below.

Surrender to Setting Limits – As sensitive souls and empaths boundaries are one of the most important things you can do to protect your energy, and also one of the hardest things you will ever have to do.  As an empath and sensitive soul it is our purpose to help others, so having to set boundaries can be both hard and scary at the same time, thoughts of who will I be without being there for everyone all of the time and what will people think are sure to bubble to the surface.

What I would like you to think about is the times where you feel really energised and what that means for the energy you are putting out into the world and then when you are depleted what energy is being received by the world.  Another way to consider enforcing boundaries is how you view others that have boundaries, what do you think about them?  I am sure it isn’t anything bad, if anything you probably envy their ability to do that.

With all that in mind, how do you feel now about placing some boundaries to protect your beautiful sensitive energy?  Let me know in the comments below, I would love to hear your experience and I can then offer you some support in putting your boundaries in place guilt free.

 

Card 2:

Your guidance starts at 3:34 in the video below

Surrender the Habit of People Pleasing – This is a habit that many sensitive souls aka helpers and nurturers tend to have, we love to be able to help others and in that we can get stuck in the habit of doing exactly what they want to make them happy.  The problem with that is it can cause others to never actually be able to get to know us, because all we are ever doing is what they want and it really leaves no room for your beautiful unique light and gifts to shine.

Now people pleasing isn’t something you just stop doing, it is more of a recovery, “Hi I’m Nicole and I’m a recovering People Pleaser”.  Little by little you can adjust your behaviour, not doing things for people just to please them, not holding back when you know there are either words or actions that would really help this person on a deeper level.  Trust me as you start to do this, what you feel and experience will be so much more and benefit you so much more on a soul level.

You will soon notice the adjustment of others behaviour towards you as well, they will be coming to you because they know you can really help them on such a deep growth level as opposed to “oh she will just do this for me”.

How does starting to reduce your habit of people pleasing, are you ready to join me in recovery as a people pleaser?  Comment below and let me know what your experience is and how you feel about starting to make changes?  I can then support you with ways to help in your recovery.

Card 3:

Your guidance starts at 5:32 in the video below

Surrender Fear – Fear is something we all have at one time or another and about different things, sometimes fear can be a good thing keeping you safe in times of perceived danger.  The issue comes when that perceived fear is just that, not actual danger, but something due to past experiences in your life making your primitive brain feel like you are in danger.  This is when your body will react within 3 secs of the perceived danger putting you into fight, flight or freeze mode, your conscious mind always takes a little longer to click to what is happening and then confusion sets in, to what is actually happening.

It can be very easy to just allow fear to be in the drivers seat, follow its lead and stop whatever you were attempting to do that your primitive brain felt was a danger.  Whilst that’s all fine and good, its really sucks when it starts to really affect your life on a deeper level, stopping you from really living your destined life and your angels feel sad when they see fear holding you back as they can see what is possible for you and your potential, they are asking you to allow them to help you in times of fear, call them in and ask them to help you to feel calmer and to understand the purpose of your fear mind.

Let me know by commenting below how fear is showing up in your life and then I can provide you with extra support on ways to combat your fear and connect in with the power of your angels.

Card 4:

Your guidance starts at 7:16 in the video below

Surrender Stress – Similar to card #3 stress is something else we all deal with and can also be helpful in times of getting you motivated and moving on a task, idea or your life purpose.  It is when you are experiencing chronic stress that its time to release it and find new and more helpful ways to cope with what you are experiencing in your life.  From personal experience I know what chronic stress can do to your body, I was under chronic stress for about 3 years after the diagnosis of my daughter with epilepsy and it had really been taking a toll on my body causing me to have injuries and also adrenal fatigue.

So I can tell you how important it is for you to surrender stress, to find other ways to ensure no matter what is happening you are not allowing the experience or circumstances to leave you in a place of stress 24/7.  Again like card #3 your angels are asking you to call on them, bring them in when you need support to cope with a difficult situation or experience, they love to be able to help you and can bring you such peace.

Let me know by commenting below how you deal with stress in your life and I can provide extra support and teach you new ways you may not of thought of or known about to help you in reducing your stress.

 

You can also watch my Video to hear more about each card and the guidance I provided ~ click below

I would love to hear how the guidance resonates for you right now, comment right here on the blog.

You can also subscribe to my YouTube Channel here….so you get notified each time I share new content.

Nicole Ivens | EFT Gold Coast

I offer 1-1 Local & Online Holistic Counselling to support you in Mind, Body & Spirit, Book your Complimentary Discovery Session Here.

How To Conquer Fear

FEAR – False Evidence Appearing Real

Fear is a big topic and one that we all deal with, the acronym for Fear is False Evidence Appearing Real, but BOY does it feel real in that moment.

When fear is rising in you, no matter what it is you are trying to do, it can really feel like your life is in danger.  Your EGO likes to keep you in your comfort zone and how does it do that?  By making your feel fearful, frightened of making change, those great thoughts of “what could go wrong?” or “who do you think you are?”.

Three Ways to Conquer Fear in your Life

1. Take Away Its Power

When fear is rising in you, it has great power, keeping you stuck and not moving forward.  So you need to take away its power, to do that you are going to take pen to paper.  {sidenote: not on the computer or your phone}  I want you to get out a notebook or piece of paper and you are going to write out all those thoughts and fears that are rising in you, as you do that it takes away its power.

When your thoughts are free to roam around  your head, they gain great momentum.  As you remove them, by writing them down, you take away the power they have over you.  Just like a rock rolling down a hill, it just gets faster and faster until you remove it from the hill, then it just comes to a STOP.

2. Supporting Evidence

What evidence is there that this thought or fear is true?  You are going to become an investigator/scientist, looking for the evidence that this fear you are experiencing is even real, does it have anything substantial backing it up.  Chances are you are not going to find much evidence if any to support this fear and thoughts associated with it, remembering F.E.A.R ~ False Evidence Appearing Real.

3. Flip the Script

Look back over your life and recognise times where you have pushed past your fear and accomplished your goals anyway, what courage and bravery that takes.  To say yes FEAR I see you but I choose to do this anyway, you get to make a choice either allowing FEAR to stop you or using it like a launching pad.

You know all those successful people you look up to, guess what they too have FEAR.  Nothing big they ever do is done without FEAR, they just make a conscious choice to not allow FEAR to stop them, using it as their driving force, their launching pad and you can do that too.

Watch this video for more guidance on Conquering Your Fear

 

Subscribe to my YouTube Channel here so you are notified each time I share new content
Comment below and let me know your thoughts on incorporating these techniques as part of your tool box.

Nicole Ivens

I offer 1-1 online soul coaching to support you in mind, body and spirit.  You can book your complimentary discovery session here.

 

 

Love Thyself

Happy Valentines Day!

Whether this day fills you with excitement or dread, it’s important to remember the message of this special day.

LOVE!

Valentines

Whilst Valentines Day is now heavily commercialised and aimed at intimate couples, there is no reason to not make this a day of love, kindness and compassion towards yourself.

Now showing love to yourself and being #1 in your life may feel strange at first, it is essential to your emotional, physical and spiritual wellbeing.

You may be having thoughts of “yeah right, like I have time for that.”  But what if I told you, you can show yourself love, kindness and compassion right now as you read this article.

Are you IN?

Wonderful let’s get to work.  In every minute of every day you have thoughts slipping past your awareness and I can guarantee they are not all good for you.

So right now I want you to think, say out loud or write down something nice about yourself.  It could be a physical attribute, a personality trait or a strength.

Ready…..Set……GO!

Did you do it?   I am trusting that you did, so imagine spending all of Valentines Day just being kind and compassionate to yourself.  How do you think  you would experience the day?  To go one step further, envision doing this every day, just saying some kind words to yourself.  Your life would start to change in ways that you can’t even imagine right now and all from a few simple kind words.

Be Kind

Our journey here on Earth isn’t one that is supposed to leave us feeling in pain, not good enough or worthy of love.  It is to spread love and joy not just to our fellow human being but most importantly to ourselves first.

Can you imagine if you spoke to your children, the way you speak to yourself, what would their life be like?  How would they feel about themselves?  Exactly, not great right.

So your mission for this Valentines Day and beyond if you choose to accept it, is to just share some kind words and thoughts with yourself.

Do you accept your mission?

Leave a reply below and let me know and if you feel up to it, share with me the kind words you are sharing with yourself today.

Nicole Ivens | EFT Practitioner

To support you in showing kindness and compassion to yourself I also offer 1-1 individual sessions.  You can book your private session here.

Tap Away Your Child’s Anxiety

Does your child or children suffer with symptoms of Anxiety?

As a sufferer of anxiety as a young child myself and raising two teenage girls who have also experienced symptoms of Anxiety, I know the pressure this puts on you as a parent and your family as a whole.  Childhood anxiety has two sides to the coin, one side is your stress as a parent in dealing with your child’s anxiety symptoms and behaviour and the other side is supporting your child to cope with the anxious symptoms and feelings.

Recently, I have come to realise that not all parents are able to recognise the signs of anxiety because that has not been their experience growing up or in their adult lived experience.  Luckily for me and my girls because of my exposure to anxiety, I can recognise it in a second and felt called to educate parents on what to look for in their child and of course tips on how to cope with it as well.

Anxiety can come in many forms and the important thing here is to understand the distinction between a child just acting out and one who is suffering from anxiety and their behaviour is completely out of their hands and not something they are doing on purpose.

What can anxiety look like?

Perfectionism – a child needing everything to be perfect and in order
Fear of trying new things – this could be a new activity or simply a new food
Worrying about events in the future
Not wanting you as their parent to leave them
Needing to know what is going to happen and when it is going to happen – who is picking me up from school today?
Fear of Failure – For example: Tests and exams at school
Overthinking is a big sign of anxiety – if you notice your child just can’t stop thinking and worrying and analysing – their big questions will be what if this happens? what if that happens?
Sleeping problems

Now not all anxiety is bad, it is completely natural for your child to feel anxious when they are starting something new, meeting new people etc.  When anxiety becomes a problem is when it starts to affect both your child’s life and is causing you stress as their parent.

Anxiety happens when a part of your child’s brain called the ‘Amygdala’ senses a threat of some kind and sends a signal that your child is in some kind of danger and they need to protect themselves.  This is where the flight, fight or freeze response comes in, they show up in the following ways:

Flight – running away and hiding in the room or not wanting to attend something
Fight – may show up like tantrums or unusual outbursts
Freeze – they may just stop and not be able to move or tell you what is wrong

So, how can you help your child if you have recognised they are suffering from anxiety symptoms?  Following I am going to teach a quick technique so you can both help your child and reduce your stress all at the same time.

  1. Tapping – EFT or Tapping is a stress reduction technique and works to quiet that part of the brain that is sending the signal of danger.  It is a very quick and effective technique that is self-applied using acupressure points on your upper body.

 

 

If you would like to learn more about this wonderful quick and effective technique, I am running a Stress Management Workshop for Parents and one of the modules is on Childhood Anxiety.  Click here to book your spot.

 

I Just Can't Meditate

Have You Ever Said “I Just Can’t Meditate”?

I Just Can’t Meditate

Have you said that to yourself or others?

Yes you!  Don’t worry I’ve got your back, so many of my clients have said this to me when I set them homework of meditating every day.  The look of fear on their face is priceless like I have asked them to give me their first born child.  Don’t worry I will never ask for your first born child, I have two teenagers and my hands are already full with as much teenage attitude as I can take.

You lay down, close your eyes and all of a sudden you are thinking about the washing  you haven’t done or the ironing piling up on the back of the couch and hang on a second did I leave the stove on, oh no it’s okay I haven’t cooked dinner yet.  Oh man I really should be cooking dinner, instead of lying here trying to meditate, oh geez I am so bad at this meditating thing, I can’t even stop thinking.   Sound familiar?

I just can't meditate

I get it and trust me I have been there so worried I was bad at meditating because I just can’t stop thinking and drive myself crazy trying to stop my thoughts and then I think about stopping my thoughts, a vicious cycle right?

It always reminds me of the saying “What You Resist Persists”, so resisting your thoughts or thinking actually causes you to think more.  Very unhelpful when you are trying to have a nice quiet moment to yourself, very rare I know.  So, what is the answer?

I have some great refreshing news for you, stopping your thoughts is very unrealistic, you have over 100,000 thoughts every day so no matter how hard you try you can’t stop them all.  Instead of trying to stop them I want you to become an observer of your thoughts, where is your focus right now?  What area of your life are your thoughts focusing in on?

That’s a big relief isn’t it, you get to just pay attention to what your thoughts are instead of trying to stop them.  I always get my clients to look at it like a courtroom, you are the judge and there is a prosecutor and a defense attorney.  You hear each side out and then  you get to decide (judge) what you keep and what you toss out and this allows you great information to what is going on in  your life and what affect your thoughts are having on your day-to-day life.

I just can't meditate

 

The other thing I like to share with my clients is meditation comes in all shapes and sizes, its not a one size fits all.  What works for someone else may not work for you, you need to do what feels right to you and something you can fit into your schedule.  I want you to think about just for a moment of an activity where you just completely lose yourself, time gets away from you and before you know it, the suns going down and the kids are yelling for dinner.

This is also a form of meditation because you are focusing on the task at hand, losing yourself in the moment and feeling a sense of joy and fulfillment.  It’s bringing you out of the external world into your internal world and giving you a break from all the stress and overwhelm that life bestows upon you sometimes.

Follow after me – “I can meditate in my own way and in my own time”

Would you like to feel supported with your meditation?  I work with clients 1-1 to support you in learning how to meditate and make it a part of your regular routine.  www.nicoleivens.com/services

 

Friendships

How To Help Nurture Your Child’s Friendships

How many times have you heard from your child “We are not friends anymore”?

I know for me I have heard that more times than I can count from my two girls and there has been times where I have just said “don’t worry I am sure you will be friends again tomorrow”, majority of the time this works out to be the case but sometimes it can be the start of something bigger.

I am going to start with asking you a question that might be a little difficult, “What happens within you when your child tells you about their friend problems?”  This is a tell tale sign of actually what needs to be dealt with first.  For example if you get a gut wrenching feeling or feel pain in your heart, this is your subconscious reminding you of a similar time when you were younger having trouble with your friends.

I know for me prior to working on my own issues from childhood with EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) I would be triggered every time one of my girls had problems with their friends at school.  If they cried, I would cry, if they were anxious, I would be anxious, but clearly that wasn’t any help to them and what they were experiencing.

Working on yourself first can have a profound affect on your child as well, also putting you in a better space to support them through what they are currently experiencing.  Seeing yourself as Switzerland, a place of neutrality is a great place to operate from when it comes to helping your child.  Neutrality gives you great insight and the space to be objective in any situation that presents itself, both in your own personal experience and experiences with your children that present themselves.

As parents it can be our first reaction to jump to conclusions that may be flawed due to the lack of information we are been provided with, obviously we want to believe everything our child is telling us and that their version of events is the complete truth.  A good thing to remember is each person has their version of events and the truth lies somewhere in the middle.

A process that I find works very well is to sit with your child and ask them to share with you exactly what happened, who said what and then help them to think about why their friend may have said different things and how they may have contributed to the situation.  I find helping your child to gain an understanding and awareness around another persons behaviour is a big step forward in them healing from the experience.

Another great way I find to help my girls is using EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) or Tapping to process what they are feeling and release the experience from their energy field, unprocessed feelings and experiences can go on to cause other problems further on in your child’s life.   Check out Episode 1 of Empowering Kids TV to learn more about how you can use EFT with your child.

Supporting your child from home can make all the difference in the interactions they have with their friends and the confidence they portray in themselves and their social interaction skills.  As a Professional Family Counsellor I work with Families to help them to empower, educate and encourage each child to be their true authentic self, building each child’s confidence and social skills is just a small part of that.

If you are noticing your child is struggling with their social skills or friendship issues, reach out and I can support both you and your child to more fruitful friendships.